Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Baby love? Not!

Okay, so yes, I have a child, but no I do not love babies or kids in general. I don't dislike them, I'm just not all girly girl about them. When Hubby and I decided we wanted children, we tried and tried. Nothing. I went through all of the normal fertility crap and still nothing. This was extremely hard on our marriage and just in general. We finally decided to adopt. It was the best thing we ever did and I wouldn't change our little girl for all of the money in the world. Unfortunately we met her (on our first trip to Russia) when she was 13 months old and we did not get to take her home (2nd trip) until she was 16 months old. We missed all of the tiny baby things. Sometimes that kinda makes me happy and sometimes not. We don't know what she looked like when she was born and that gets to me sometimes. Anyway, we went through hell and back for a year to get her. By Colorado law you have to take 22 hours of parenting classes to adopt. Every kind of psychological and physical test known to man has to be taken as well. To say nothing of how expensive it was! And we did it legally. Anyway, it bugs me when I see some pregnant teenager who didn't have to do all that stuff and I find it a little unfair. I really don't like hanging around pregnant people of any age, but it's the teenagers that bug me. This brings me to my point. I don't like meeting babies! Especially babies of people I don't even know! For some reason when people pop out a child they feel the need to show every living human being what they have accomplished. I, for one, am not interested! If it's a family member or a close friend, of course I'm interested. I just finished crocheting a gift for a cousin of Hubby's that had a very cute little girl. I know her mother quite well and I have met the father a few times. I hope I get to meet her, since I know the parents and they are family. Today, though, something happened that set off this rampage. Without going into too much detail. Somebody, who I have met once or twice, was in the store today wanting me to see their child. When I heard they were coming, like the child I am, I ran out to do "errands". They waited and waited for me to come back. I don't understand why it was so important for me to see their baby! Especially when given the chance, twice earlier in the day, to see it and I didn't go then. I don't know what to say to babies. I'm not good with them. More importantly though, it makes me sad. It's hard for me to see what someone can do, but I can't. Plain and simple...I'm jealous! Again, I would not trade my little girl for anything, but I wish I had given birth to her. Putting all of that aside, though. I still really don't like other people's babies. When we got our daughter I sure didn't parade her about town. Taking her to see every single person I had ever met. People get a clue! Just because you had a baby doesn't mean everyone wants to see it. If they want to see it, they will find you. Don't worry! Some of us have reasons for not wanting to see your spawn.


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